Lucy, Nancy, are perpetually calling upon me to tell them
something of Sir Charles Grandison; and when I begin, I know not how to
leave off. My uncle rallies me, laughs at me, sometimes reminds me of
what he calls my former brags. I did not brag, my dear: I only hoped,
that respecting as I did every man according to his merit, I should never
be greatly taken with any one, before duty added force to the
inclination. Methinks the company of the friends I am with, does not
satisfy me; yet they never were dearer to me than they now are. I want
to have Lord and Lady L----, Lord and Lady G----, Dr. Bartlett, my Emily,
with me. To lose you all at once!--is hard!--There seems to be a strange
void in my heart--And so much, at present, for the state of that heart.
I always had reason to think myself greatly obliged to my friends and
neighbours all around us; but never, till my return, after these few
months absence, knew how much. So many kind visitors; such unaffected
expressions of joy on my return; that had I not a very great
counterbalance on my heart, would be enough to make me proud.
My grandmamma went to Shirley-manor on Saturday; on Monday I was with her
all day: but she would have it that I should be melancholy if I staid
with her. And she is so self-denyingly careful of her Harriet! There
never was a more noble heart in woman. But her solitary moments, as my
uncle calls them, are her moments of joy.
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