A more welcome sight was
a huge wooden dresser with drawers and a fine cupboard in
the corner. It only wanted a table and a chair to be a
furnished room.
Then I ascended again and went up the first flight of
stairs. There were two other good sized apartments
there. One should be my bedroom, and the other a spare
room. And then another flight with two more. One for
the servant, when I had one, and the other for a guest.
From the windows I had a view of the undulating gray
back of the city, with the bustle of green tree tops. It
was a windy day, and the clouds were drifting swiftly
across the heavens, with glimpses of blue between. I
don't know how it was, but as I stood looking through the
grimy panes in the empty rooms a sudden sense of my own
individuality and of my responsibility to some higher
power came upon me, with a vividness which was
overpowering. Here was a new chapter of my life about to
be opened. What was to be the end of it? I had
strength, I had gifts. What was I going to do with them?
All the world, the street, the cabs, the houses, seemed
to fall away, and the mite of a figure and the
unspeakable Guide of the Universe were for an instant
face to face. I was on my knees--hurled down all against
my own will, as it were. And even then I could find no
words to say. Only vague yearnings and emotions and a
heartfelt wish to put my shoulder to the great wheel of
good.
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